T. G. I. ---S!!

hen you turn that clock up an hour tonight what do you think about....I get kinda irritated to think I have to change my schedule lose an hour of my Saturday.....and watch my timing in the mornings when getting ready for work..The ONLY good thing about it is, I wont be so hungry when I get off work!! My body will still be on the "old" schedule...for a while. I will probably feel sleepy and grumpy in the mornings, but trying to look on the "bright" side, more birds will be out when I get up..they love to get at the feeders early.  I may actually  catch a glimpse of a bald eagle flying over the pond that I pass everyday on my drive in, the early Eagle gets the fish right?

Time is something that I wish I could capture and control...imagine that? "If I could put time in a bottle" I think I would make every day Saturday! HA.

I have a dream for my 'golden' yrs...and that makes me think of the other years the ones behind me...and how cool it would have been to have had a plan, a plot to follow to bring my dreams into fruition, I DID but at the time I didnt know that it actually works!!  IF ONLY I knew then what I know now...eh? Wouldnt we all love that. I did have a dream, and worked toward it, but I didnt keep my dream in the foreground....little by little I allowed my dreams (life plan) to become second in my life and bit by bit it disappeared as family life steamrolled right over me... not only did I lose touch with my dream I lost touch with who I was, lost feeling for the man I loved, and lost my zeal to keep trying.

I dont blame anyone for the demise of my dreams...but I sure will blame ME if I dont realize the "rest of them". That old saying if I knew then what I know now really comes into play at this point....well I have to take what I know NOW and put it to use.  By thinking I had to be all things to all people I made a right mess of things! I know that unfaltering focus is the only way to get to the place one needs to be in life to bring a dream into reality. IM not talking greed or an uncaring heart---but a focus on what you want..first help yourself then you can help others.  I didnt, but sure wish I had.

My dream in a nut shell was to have a horse ranch.  WE got close...(I married a man who shared the same love of horses as mine) we bought a small place in the country (10 acres)....we worked hard to built it up little by little and at one point we had 4 horses on our little ranch we called Springbrow--

On Saturday mornings we got up early, just after dawn, fed, groomed, and saddled up the horses....after a cup of coffee we set off for at least a two hour trail ride...it was fun, and the climax of our dream. The early morning rise was so great.  The sun brightened everything, the birds sang loudly and the scents of  a new day was always strong and Earthy as we headed down the driveway and onto the dirt road...then eventually the trails through the woods and fields.

After the ride with the horses taken care of we would cook a hearty breakfast together and eat outside on the spacious screen porch I had built with my own two hands.... later we'd relax the rest of the day, or spend time doing chores around our little ranch, talking about our dreams for the future...

Then a step child moved in with us from his previous marriage, along came a child of our own, school, more responsibility, work, bills, we drifted apart, and the hurricane of family life dragged me along and I lost the focus of my dream...we lost the focus of OUR dream....as I/we lost focus the dream began to fade...one by one the horses disappeared until the last one passed away in 1996.  Then the fences grew old, rusted, and sagged, the roof of the barn rotted and fell in, the children left home and we had grown old and fell silent...nothing remained of our original dream we had nothing in common, and we separated after 26 yrs of marriage,  and now we are finally divorcing and selling the place....our beloved little ranch, he wants the money, I want the land, but have no money to buy him out and dont wish to sacrifice my future to save a piece of the past....soooooo...
that dream was realized, burned brightly for a while, and then it went dark---my new dream is to retire at least 2 yrs early and travel.  I have purchased a van (its kinda old but Im hopefull) and God willing, I hope to travel slowwwwly and discover America up close and personal....I must focus  to make every day "Saturday"!!